Football.

Yesterday night, for the first time in my adult life, I played football in the rain.

I know its a romanticized notion, bunch of brawny all-stars playing football in the rains, slathered in mud and then taking a shower with Cinthol soap as a group of nubile angels from heaven watch on and cheer and hoot and sigh.

Bullshit.

Happens only in the mind-numbing skull-splitting ads on TV.

So in reality, we play football every wednesday at this rather nice floodlit, grass-turf near my house. With the Bangalore weather being so un-predictable, some days it rains. Now I have not played football in close to nine years. I am in my 30's - not as fit as I would like to be, but probably a bit ahead of the curve.

But it's pure fun. 90 minutes of grueling exercise that leaves me on an endorphin-high, dog-tired and battered but glowing and radiant at the same time. Probably the most intense work out I get for my carb-inflated, soft body that definitely needs more exercise.

Trust me, in school days I loved football. If there is a sport that I love more than the most revered religion of India (cricket) thats football. I am not crazy - like Man-U stalking, beer guzzling, TV-hugging fan of the game but am more of a world-cup, copa-america, Euro-cup statistics loving, Know only Messi-Ronaldo-Sunil Chetri, watching the biggie matches  or the "Goals!" edition on Star SportsHD kinda fan of the game. But in the school-time, it was more like, all fifteen of us running like headless chickens, scrambling together after that one battered ball all across the field, back and forth, screaming and whooping. It was fun. Not serious.

Here, we still play for fun. But it's serious. It's usually seven-a-side football and wing or defense is where I play. Most teams play in formation; 2-3-2 a balanced one or the more attacking 2-2-3 formation as well. Yesterday we demolished the other side 7-1. I fancied myself to be a decent ball player but I have realized as I have grown older, I have lost the ability to run with the ball for long winded runs. And I'm a bit wary of wading into a scuffle; for fear of twisting an ankle or pulling a hamstring. real fears as we realize this body is not a machine. Sigh.

But still - I think I like this new found love for the game at this age.

Indeed, Joga Bonita People! 

The Eternal Questions in Life

Some days are foggy. When reason fails to cut through the clutter.
And I question the purpose of existence. For a larger picture, that someone above is languidly painting on my black and white canvas of a life. I keep wondering when He is going to dip his brush into that pot of bright poster colors (kept open and drying fast beside Him) and splash across my canvas. To bring it alive in an explosion of multi colored hues and shades. And to this day, I keep waiting.

As usual, am in the middle of a transition period in life. And as usual, faced with ponderous life-threatening decisions to make, I am indeed confused. As would any youngling in his impressionable twenties trying to tie down the loose ends of his life, would rightfully be. And Lord, lend me strength to make that right decision.

Today was yet another blotch on my existence. When the guilt that I have not been productive and not contributed to the well being of the other six-billion creatures who walk this earth with me, is slowly threatening to swallow my soul.

I pass time by trying to draft that perfect “separation” notice letter to my employer, praying this does not end in another of those blood baths. (too much blood have I been witness to) I am happy, I am gonna be doing something I love. The lure of greenbacks is hard to resist again. Which doesn’t hurt of course.
And what gnaws at the back of my mind? That I would displease someone whom I really don’t give a rat’s backside about? Somebody pin down that black shadow of a doubt and execute it for me please. I cannot bear to think straight with that hooded assassin (of reason? of logic?) lurking in the back of my mind. Help!

From flames to dust,
Lovers to Friends,
Why do all good things come to an end?

G-TALK: Keeping in Touch

G-talk has definitely arrived. On turbo-jet engines, skidding screeching, burning rubbers, it has pervaded the lives of all us net-addicts. the latest fad to keep in touch, I know I'm perhaps a tad bit late in announcing this, especially in our present-day supercharged lives where a few minutes past becomes old news in a jiffy. Yeah, so for me, G-Talk with the SM(s) - Status Messages - measures how my life has progressed ( or retrogressed!) over past few months. Interesting to note the SM's and then reconstruct your life based on that. Take a look - how life takes the swan-dive into the depths of melancholy and my sincere G-TALK icon bears witness to all that.

Crossing the Chasm now.
I’m blind and waiting for you, God it’s good to be alive!
You’re my favorite damn disease.
Something’s in life are better off rich – Coffee, Chocolate and ME!
We cracked the top 20 in the world, whoa!
All night, Making friends with Shadows.
Lost in Lala land.
Walls will fall before we do.
Wrap me up in a dream with you.
Back from Dead.
Surviving the Holocaust.
I’m Jack’s broken heart.
I’m Jack’s elated heart on a song.
Dealing with Broken Things
Sieving through Kaleidoscope of memories.
Grey & Colorless – Rain Clouds or Heartbreak?

There, I rest my case and leave interpretations to your overly-imaginative mind fed on television and new age cinema. Peace out, shall update with more SM's as life hits the road to recovery :-)